Coherent

The evening was overcome with sadness—a profound level of emotional despair with a planned trip back home this week. I was informed of a distressing situation at home. Yes, it involves mom. Mom isn’t doing well. They said she’s okay, but I can’t have a coherent conversation with her anymore.

“No, she’s not okay.”

I’m going back home.

Writing about it helps—it lessens the emotion that I try so
hard to shut off when I’m at work and have to lead. Writing about it helps confirm that my emotions are real— I do feel pain. Through it all I question whether my life choices were the best possible.

I am not fulfilling my culturally expected role of taking
care of my ailing family member.

I’ll be there soon.